Tuesday, December 14, 2010

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In A Foreign Hands
By: Ferdinand Panerio


It is good to have an open-mind as man live under by the grace of God. For me this the moment to treasure the entire thing we comprehend through our experiences and pondered the valued words that means to life. As I take glimpse of my past 15 years, I remember the worst life I had. But instead of giving time to it, now I realized the most that glimpses are for values. And I found out in life that the decisions I make each day reflects my personality and my approaches towards others. But I never comprehend these things without giving ears to my environs and have self- evaluation unto it, including myself. Actually it is not is easy to live a life consumed by assumption without experiencing tremendous challenges and compromises not. To find out the mystery of mysteries revealed only through Christ Jesus our Lord. I come to know these things for enduring what is set before me. Although my life is on the battle of flesh, I still keep in mind His Word that awakes me. For over the years I know nothing about the essence of life, because I am one of the wanderer Christians at that time. I go to church and listen to the preacher but without giving ears to its value. Even though I am less- religious at that time but still I love being as Christian even though I am lacking to fell His presence. Many times I question my faith and throw a lot question to God. But still hard to find an answer, going to Church at sometimes in Sunday is not enough. I was 22 years of age at that time and attended Grace Alliance Church in Makilla, North Cotabato. When it is my first time to visit it was the moment I have still many question. I even not notice God answer to my question. As an IT instructor both pre-school and elementary school, at the same time data-encoder. And again I find it too difficult to work in a foreign land in a foreign hand without being equip to handle or face the negative atmosphere. When I faced difficulties in my job I found that it is too easy to stay. Leaving my job in proper ways without regrets, I realized something must be done but I don’t know where to star, and why the things really happen. Preparing to face the consequences and what circumstances it maybe not easy and always a though things to do.

Hunted by my own self again, it is the inside that soothed me through mental-pictures and dreams that consuming me. At my early age I think that I am encountering failure after failures. But now I realized it is not all failures but something I use a kind of approach that really doesn’t work out well that needs me to find the best ways. In my present environ I learned this things through giving ears and paying attention to the unusual things happen inside and out. When I deal on this matter it is really not easy because I am studying theological school that time and now in present finishing my studies. My fellow classmate and school mates know what the strange things happen to me. Because at that moment I have a lot of questions in my life, my environ, the forces of nature and God only knows. While I am encountering another experiences in a foreign hands again. And in this moment I draw a lot of questions and comments of what was happen around and my surrounding during mid-night and or in sometimes 3 or 4 in the morning. Still there where unanswered questions. Facing a new faces and cultures it is too difficult for me, while I am trying to understand what the strange things happen in me. And when I let not myself to be entertained and be influence by negative forces around me, I become dumbfounded as I see different things. When I share something what happen in my life and ask comments and suggestion for them, I am failed mostly to have the significance answers. Sometimes I receive nothing from my respected friends, even a single sound advice that relates to my questions. But I am thankful to the Lord that little by little He gives me an answer through unusual but special ways. As I seek what the mystery of life, it only revealed through the Lord Jesus Christ. When I pondered His Words it draws my attention to many wonderful things and cherishable insight HE has given to me.

Now, I find it is easy to live as being truly set free. Overcoming the hurdles in life is a really a personal things that takes time and demand our choices. It matters also on how we comprehend the environ. I know that I gone astray in foreign hands both physical and the inside forces. But dealing with it was worth enough through faith. By faith, I learned to trust myself while others throw a lot of negative words. Being without favor of some foreigner while others are alienated with authority, I found and experience the hands of God and even hear his voice. To pay evil for evil really is not good. Being quite and cool knowing that there where time to speak and to keep silence helps me to handle myself and hold my decision. Thus, maturity and personal growth matters on my choices not the time. How we react to the forces around would means to the development of our personality. To be alienated is not all in bad terms. I realized being in a solitary place at sometimes was beneficial of having glimpse for the good times and bad times, it helps me how to evaluate myself.

My experience helps me to build my character and makes me able to give ears to the forces of nature, and His words. And how to deals the present environ that mostly controlled by the negative forces. Then to find our year, that the life without a purpose is the greatest tragedy in life. I believe God makes us for a reason, you and I part of it, glorifying God as well. While having this comprehension that this dissimilarity of approach I am dealing with is also part of the differences (uniqueness) in life that I need to deal with…… while being in the foreign hand in foreign ground where I need to journey in the course of time and spaces that I may find my true self inside………………





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